


Twas the Night Before Christmas

by CosmicSheepy



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Christmas, F/F, Pharmercy sort of, Poem Rewrite
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 05:11:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8652259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CosmicSheepy/pseuds/CosmicSheepy
Summary: The Overwatch Team stars in a Christmas Classic.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A rewrite of 'Twas the Night Before Christmas' by Clement Clark Moore, but with the idiots of Overwatch. Please enjoy.

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro’ the house, Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; 

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there; 

All Overwatch was nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of POTG danc’d in their heads, 

And Mercy in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap- 

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter. 

Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters, and saw Junker trash. 

The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow, Gave the lustre of mid-day to the field below; 

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a junk of a sleigh, and a fat ass reindeer, 

With a greasy thin driver, and reindeer so fat, I knew in a moment it must be Junkrat. 

Down to the house quickly, sped Mako and James And he whistled, and shouted, and call’d his pal names: 

“Now! Fatty, now! Hoggy, now! Porky, and Jiggles, “On! Piggy, on! Roady, on! Tubby and Wiggles; 

“To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall! “Now blow em up! blow em up! blow em up all!” 

So up to the house-top, twas Junkrat he threw, With the sleigh full of Toys - and his Riptire too: 

And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof the clanking and slipping of his wooden hoof. 

As I drew in my head, and was turning around, Down the chimney the junkers, they came with a bound: 

They were dressed like some kids, in a bad christmas play And they smelled like they’d been through a gasoline spray: 

A bundle of something was flung on his back, And he look’d like a peddler just opening his pack: 

His eyes - how they were wild! his smile was creepy, I hoped I was dreaming and still just quite sleepy;

His row of sharp teeth were exposed like a trap, And the back of his head, Roadhog wanted to slap; 

The fat man he sighed, and just shook his head, He’d rather be drinking, and curled up in bed. 

He still had his mask, with a red nose on the end And he looked about ready to murder his friend. 

I felt bad for the situation he’d gotten himself, And I laugh’d when I saw them in spite of myself; 

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head Soon gave me to know I had something to dread. 

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work, And poured some black power; 

I turn’d with a jerk, I ran to my room, snatched Mercy right up 

And jumped through the window for the house could erupt He set some more wires, and several more bombs

As Ana chucked D.Va from the window, what a good mom, 

But I heard him exclaim, before being blasted from sight-  "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night."


End file.
